Longest Vulgar Palindrome

As you probably know, a palindrome reads the same backwards as it does forwards. Computers can generate really long palindromes but they are completely meaningless. For example, this is the current computer record holder (105,302 characters).

To create a meaningful one you need to ditch the dictionary and use your creativity. A long time favourite is:

“A man, a plan, a canal – Panama!” (32 characters)

For those with dirtier minds, the question arises – what would the longest meaningful vulgar palindrome be? I abused the Google and the longest I fund was:

“A slut nixes sex in Tulsa.” (26 characters)

Not bad, huh? It is only 6 characters shorter than the Panama favourite.

But, it gets better – if we change the language.

In Croatian (same in Serbian) there is a really nice one:

“Mišu pita Dara: ‘Da ti pušim?’” (30 characters)

It translates to “Dara asks Mišo: do you want a blowjob?” First time I heard it, I couldn’t stop laughing. It is funny because it is completely natural; that is the exact phrase Dara would ask Mišo. Contrast that to the Panama and Tulsa examples and they seem a bit stretched.

So I asked Google for more fun in Serbo-Croatian. To my surprise, I found an even longer one:

“U Bejrutu Arapi kipara u tur jebu.” (34 characters)

That one translates to “In Beirut Arabs f**k sculptor in the bum.” Less natural, less fun, but this is the new vulgar record holder! And it is 2 characters longer that the English Panama favourite.

How can that be? English has 19x more native speakers!

Is this because of the language? Maybe Serbo-Croatian is more “melodic” in terms of profanities?

Or it is because of the culture? Which brings the question:

WHAT KIND OF SICK PEOPLE INVENT VULGAR PALINDROMES ANYWAY?!

People who like both crosswords and swear words? Do they sit down with a pen and paper and try to match reverted “slut” and “sex” with other words? Instead of sudoku, they relax by finding names that start with reverted “blowjob”? That is a some fun creative process, and it seems that thousands of man-hours went into it 😀

 

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One thought on “Longest Vulgar Palindrome

  1. Some time ago I read a Scientific American article about someone who noticed that if you say “A man, a plan, a cat, a canal – Panama!” it’s still a palindrome. They went on to write a computer program to add more words to the sentence and generated a very long palindrome. Unfortunately I don’t have a link.

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